bart_calendar (bart_calendar) wrote,


I almost always see my shrink twice a week and sometimes three times a week. But last Thursday she locked her keys in her office so tomorrow will be the first time in almost a year that I've gone a full week without seeing her.

It sorta throws me for a loop. In general, and I hope I'm not the only one who does this, I kinda rehearse what I'm going to say to her. Just so I won't waste my time.

And, the way it works in France is that you are not stuck to the 50 minute sessions you get in America. Sometimes a session is 15 minutes, sometimes it's close to two hours. It depends on how much progress she thinks you are making in the session.

So, of course, you try to think of the stuff that will get you the most progress (hello transference!!! I want my gold star!)

Generally, if I've been away for only two or three days it's not hard to figure out what to bring up.

But now it's been a week!

Fuck!! So many options!

1. The weird paranoia about sending Rome Girl the bank card that made me almost afraid to leave the apartment.

2. My growing temptation - which I have not given into - to start on four Xanax instead of three a day.

3. How much I fucking miss my girlfriend?

4. The stalker who has spent three days telling me I'm an unattractive loser, ranting against fat girls, telling me that Rome Girl does not exist and is now trashing me on her own blog after giving charlotte_webb shit?

5. How weird I feel about using Rome Girl's chair - even though she isn't here?

6. My weird obsession with rereading books I read years ago?

What the fuck?

Too many choices!
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