bart_calendar (bart_calendar) wrote,

Happy Sperm Day

Gotta love wacky medical controversies.

The deal is that Surgery News - a trade publication for surgeons - ran an "interesting" editorial in their February issue.

What they said was that sperm makes women happy and therefore if you want to make your partner happy on Valentine's Day, giving her unprotected sex would be better than chocolate. They provide scientific data to back this up:

"Female college students having unprotected sex were significantly less depressed than were those whose partners used condoms (Arch. Sex. Behav. 2002;31:289-93). Their better moods were not just a feature of promiscuity, because women using condoms were just as depressed as those practicing total abstinence. The benefits of semen contact also were seen in fewer suicide attempts and better performance on cognition tests."

Yes, you read that correctly. College girls who let their partner cum inside them instead of pulling out or wearing a condom did better on tests than girls who practiced safe sex.

Anyway, this caused an uproar in the community that reads Surgery News to the point where they not only issued a retraction they recalled all physical copies of the magazine and deleted the entire online issue.

The bottom line: If your girlfriend is always depressed, getting bad grades and talking about suicide, clearly it's because you are using condoms. Just talk her into accepting your load and she'll be Magna Cum Laude and talking about pretty flowers and unicorns.
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