October 2nd, 2011

Almost Famous

So, I'm sitting outside the bar last night with a couple friends and this seriously cute girl comes up to me.

(This conversation was in French, but I can't be bothered to write it out in that language.)

She says "I'm sorry if I'm bothering you."

I say "No problem."

She says "Are you an American actor?"

I respond, "Quoi?"

She then points to her even cuter friend and says "My friend is sure she's seen you in several films but can't figure out which ones."

I then say honestly that her friend is mistaken and that I'm a writer.

She goes back to her friend and at that point my friends who had watched this exchange started totally making fun of me and pointing out that I'd just missed an easy opportunity to get laid.

Fuck, my general impulse to respond honestly cock blocked me.

P.S. A female friend of mine after hearing this story commented: " men are desperate. you really are. we have to put up a sign with flashing lights saying "I think you are hot and I would like you to fuck me", and even then you think it says "I like you and would like you to be my friend"

Rock And Roll Trivia - A Way Of Life

You know the rules. I post the lyrics - you see how many you can get without Google or Wikipedia.

1. Childhood living is easy to do.

2. You make a dead man cum.

3. I'm all sixes and sevens and nines.

4. Gotta find my way to heaven cause I did my time in hell.

5. Do unto strangers what you do to yourself.

6. Black girls just want to get fucked all night.

7. Hear me whip the women just around midnight.

8. We all need someone we can cream on.

9. I saw her today at the reception, a glass of wine in her hand.

10. She blew my nose and then she blew my mind.