October 1st, 2011

A Minor Pet Peave With The New Mortal Kombat

The only flaw I've seen so far in the new Mortal Kombat is a weird and frustrating one.

Leading up to the first fight against Shao Khan you have to do dozens of fights against other computer controlled characters.

In each of those fights the computer expects you to use fancy moves like throwing lighting or other magic shit, so all its defenses are based around that. What that means is that if you just go for pure physical attacks your odds of winning those fights goes up by quite a lot.

What this does is train you to be really, really good at physical attacks, but you don't end up bothering to learn the special attacks and if you do happen to learn one or two your skills at them atrophy.

Then, when you do get to Shao Khan you find he's completely immune to physical attacks and can only be hurt by Liu Kang's special magic fireball attack - which you would have no reason on earth to have learned up to this point. So, you have to pause out of story mode and go into the practice mode and spend a bunch of time learning it.

I have no problem with needing special moves to beat a big boss - but most video games would have set up previous encounters with other minor characters that would have encouraged you to use those moves. Making you have to use a move that you'd never use against any other character (because they'd all block it easily) seems like kind of a cheat.

I mean, seriously, what is the point of setting up a system that makes you really skilled at the types of attacks that one of the big bad guys can't be hurt by in any way, shape or form?

Ringer

You know I can't decide on this show. In many ways it's a lot of fun. and two Sarah Michelle Gellers is better than one.

On the other hand, who knew that they could put her in a show that's even less plausible than Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

Seriously, this show makes all of the events in Sunnydale seem like abject realism in comparison. Just the number of things that happen that do not fucking happen in the real world or just don't follow basic logic is astounding.

1. Nobody in the history of Paris has ever ordered a cup of coffee in a cafe and had it served in a cup that looks remotely like that.

2. If you recently found out your wife was pregnant and she suddenly lost 15 pounds and all her friends were asking what diet she was on, wouldn't you notice she'd lost weight? Wouldn't you be concerned and suggest she see her doctor?

3. Do you know what dead bodies smell like? Let me give you a hint. When you die, you take a massive shit. Plus flies come around within five minutes. Therefore, a dead body that had been sitting in a suitcase in room temperature for a day and a half would sort of stand out at a cocktail party in an enclosed space, because it would smell to high heaven and have insects swarming around it.

4. Does the FBI really spend this much time and money chasing down reluctant witnesses? Particularly when said witness is a known drug addict with a long string of arrests and would probably not be taken that seriously by a jury.

5. How the hell did Evil Rich SMG's husband know she was pregnant last week, when Evil Rich SMG didn't find out until this week?

6. Ok. I'm willing to believe that Good Poor SMG has led a different life than her Evil Rich Sister, but are we really expected to believe that Good Poor SMG has never heard of Fashion Week (and if she hadn't couldn't deduce from the name what it probably is?)

7. Doesn't Evil Rich SMG realize that Good Poor SMG is going to realize she's still alive when, you know, on her latest bank statement there are ATM withdrawals from Paris? To say nothing of Evil SMG's husband who is in finance and understands money. Won't he wonder why there are all these credit card charges in Paris when as far as he can tell his wife has been in New York the entire time?

8. Speaking of which - if the FBI can figure out that Evil Rich SMG was fucking her best friend's husband, don't they also have the resources to notice that there are all these charges in Paris?

9. Is there some reason I'm missing as to why Good Poor SMG didn't just give the phone to Earnest FBI Agent and say "hey somebody has been threatening me. They attacked me and this phone fell out of their pocket." She could have easily played it off as "Maybe this is connected to my drug addict sister" stopped the FBI from hassling her and gotten whoever the fuck is trying to kill her to back the fuck off. Even if the FBI found the fucking body they would def assume that it was Druggie Sister and not Rich Society Sister who pulled the trigger.

10. All that said, I still like the show.

11. If you gave birth to identical twin sisters would you really give one of them a super exotic name and the other a really normal name?

The Twilight Zone

Ok, this poll requires you to suspend a bit of disbelief.

For the sake of this poll assume these two things to be true:

1. It is possible to resurrect Richard Nixon from the grave and possible for him to run in the GOP primaries.

2. That whoever wins the GOP primaries will be the next president.

In a magical land where those two things are true, who would you prefer to win the GOP nomination and then become our next president?

Poll #1783203 Who Would You Rather?

Who Would You Rather Be The Next President?

Nixon
33(73.3%)
Bachmann
0(0.0%)
Perry
0(0.0%)
Romney
5(11.1%)
Newt
0(0.0%)
Ron Paul
7(15.6%)
Santorum
0(0.0%)

Amusing Part Of My Day

I really don't know that much about fantasy fiction. But I liked reading Game of Thrones and don't want to spoil season two by reading book two in A Song Of Ice And Fire, so I decided to check out the Fantasy Fiction section of my local English language bookshop to see if there was anything that looked worth picking up. (Note, if this is not what this genre is called in America, I'm sorry. It's just how the section with Game Of Thrones in it is labeled at my bookshop.)

Anyway, I didn't find anything that stood out enough for me to buy, but I was amused to notice that "Atlas Shrugged" and "The Fountainhead" were both included in the same section as Game Of Thrones and the other books that have pictures of dragons, men in chain mail, unicorns, aliens, etc... on the cover.