September 9th, 2011

Red State By Kevin Smith

So, even though Red State doesn't get a theatrical release until Sept. 25th Kevin Smith has leaked high def copies of it online and we watched it tonight.

Holy fucking mother of shit is this film going to cause a shitstorm when it comes out.

I've never before seen something that is both pure B movie exploitation film and a serious social commentary at the same time. Imagine if Saw, Machete and It's A Wonderful Life were somehow fused into one film in a way that actually worked.

The plot is deceptively simple. The Westboro Baptist Church and the FBI have an armed standoff. What's interesting is that he makes both the FBI and the God Hates Fags people both look equally like shit.

To say the violence and cynicism in this film is extreme is an understatement. When one of the two groups is asked why they let the slaughter happen the response is "Why? Because fuck these people. That's why."

What's interesting is that underneath the surface plot another story is going on - and one which shows that despite his protestations Kevin Smith remains a Catholic boy at heart who wants to believe in Jesus even if he thinks many of today's followers of Jesus are full of shit.

That said the online leak screams that Smith is a cynic himself. He knows this film will cause an absolute shitstorm when it comes out and he's trying to start the shitstorm in advance to get publicity out of it. (And I guess I'm doing exactly what he wants people to do by watching it and then blogging about it before it gets a real release.)

In the trailer for Red State they quote Quentin Tarantino as saying "I love this film!"

I have no doubt that's a real quote. The movie is probably Quentin's high budget B movie wet dream.

Will you like it? Hard to say. Can you see the grim humor in very cynical very gratuitous violence when done the right way? I can and so I can enjoy it. But that's me.

Would innocent completely defenseless people getting slaughtered in very graphic ways for 90 minutes straight bother you? If so, then you'll hate it.

I do have to give Smith a lot of credit.

It would have been very easy to just make the Westboro Baptist Church people the bad guys. To demonstrate that the Feds could be just as bad - and make it realistic - is a ballsy move.

Anyway, I give it four stars with a warning. If anything in American Psycho triggered you, you'll regret seeing this film. If, like me, you saw American Psycho as hilarious satire you'll love it.

Cuts

It's that time of year again - when American girls who have only interacted with cut cocks arrive in Montpellier with visions of having a French lover in their heads end up interacting with their first uncut cock.

By next week 70 percent of the conversations I'll overhear between girls at bars will be about the differences between Euro dick and American dick.

So, poll time!

Guys, Is Your Dick Cut Or Uncut?

Cut
21(35.6%)
Uncut
11(18.6%)
I Don't Have A Dick
27(45.8%)

Ladies, Do You Prefer Your Guys Cut Or Uncut?

Cut
7(10.9%)
Uncut
11(17.2%)
Don't Care At All
27(42.2%)
Don't Care As Long As It's Big
12(18.8%)
Other
7(10.9%)

Batty

For the fourth time in two weeks a bat flew into our apartment last night.

My cat looked up at it and yawned and went back to sleep.

What kind of cat isn't interested in a fast moving flying mammal for Christ sakes?

Rome Girl wonders if the reason this is happening is because she switched from commercially made cigarettes to pure tobacco that she turns into cigarettes with a cigarette making machine three weeks ago. The tobacco smells sweeter then normal cigarettes so maybe the bats think it smells like something that would attract bugs?

People in town have another theory. Apparently the bats used to live in the marshland outside of town because there were a ton of mosquitoes there but the city did something this year to kill the mosquitoes so now the bats are moving inland looking for food.

Either way, I'm getting really, really good at coaxing bats out the window while Rome Girl hides in the bathroom.

And, honestly, the bats don't bother me at all. I think they are sort of cute.