I've got to give credit to the guy who wrote this
Craigslist Ad.The gist of it is that he's broke and will do anything short of theft or murder to earn money.
He even breaks it down by dollar value.
Some examples:
Things I Will Do For $5:
Stare at you for 5 minutes
Give a hug to the person of your choosing
Things I Will Do For $10:
Host a conference call with you and a person that you've always thought was cool but never really got the chance to hang out with, you know?
Things I Will Do For $100,000:
Yell your name every time I wake up for the rest of my life
There's a lot more listed - check it out.