November 1st, 2010

Deep Thoughts

If you are willing to confess to killing the sheriff, why be so adamant that you didn't shoot the deputy?

I mean, either way you've killed at least one cop which means life in prison or the death penalty.

Plus, I'm pretty sure that he/she did shoot the deputy.

If my friends and I had heard a rumor that one of our friends had shot the deputy we wouldn't know what to think at first. But if he or she came in and just said "Hey, I didn't shoot the deputy" and then changed the subject, we'd give them the benefit of the doubt.

But, if every 30 seconds they kept saying over and over again that they didn't shoot the deputy, we'd figure they had a guilty conscious and wonder if not only did they shoot the sheriff and the deputy, but perhaps the dispatcher as well.

Sigh

So, the latest controversy to absorb the attention of the Internet is that Stepehn Fry claimed in an interview that he feels bad for straight men because he thinks straight women don't like sex.

His argument essentially boils down to his feeling that if straight women liked cock as much as gay men do they would be cruising parks at night, going to glory holes, fucking in public toilets and that every straight bar would have a back room for random sex acts, the way most gay bars do.

So, he's decided that women just have sex because they are looking for emotional intimacy and/or financial security.

Lots of women, predictably, are going apeshit.

But, why? Stephen Fry is a gay dude. Taking what he says seriously about pussy is like listening to a review of a steak house written by a life long member of PETA.

Here's a news flash: In the same way that straight dudes don't get gay or lesbian sex and will therefore say stupid things about it, gay dudes don't understand the tuna taco and will therefore say stupid things about it too.

Instead of sending a bunch of angry tweets to him and writing endless blog posts about what he said why not just be like "Well, a lot of gay dudes are scared of pussy and female intimacy and are sorta heterophobic the same way a lot of straight dudes are scared of cock and male intimacy and homophobic."

I think that a lot of the outrage comes from the fact that a lot of women seem to asexualize gay dudes and lump them into a field of "oh, they are all such nice guys" so they are shocked when gay guys end up being just like regular guys and just as apt to say stupid things about women.

Which is to say that gay dudes aren't just one of the girls who happens to have a penis or an accessory to take with you to parties and on shopping sprees.

They are just dudes. And all of us dudes, gay, straight, bi or asexual are pretty clueless about girls and often stupid about sex.

It's just that for us dudes who like pussy, being clueless about it is part of the attraction. For dudes who don't like pussy, being clueless about it can make it seem kinda scary and alien.