August 11th, 2010

Deep Thoughts

One of Derrida's most controversial assertions is that "spelling is tyranny."

I wonder if he simply came to that conclusion because he's French and, let's be honest, French spelling makes no fucking sense at all.

Maybe if he'd grown up in Spain where there is a much stronger connection between spelling and phonics he would have come to a different conclusion.

Literature Cock Blocks

Jezebel today has an article about books you can read in public that will help you get laid or at least spark a conversation with an attractive stranger.

That's all well and good, but what would be more interesting is a list of books that will keep you from getting laid if you are reading them in public and then try to chat someone up who has seen you with them.

I'll start the list, but feel free to add your own contributions.

The Pick Up Artist

Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus

He's Just Not That Into You

Men! Where The Fuck Are They?

The Catcher In The Rye

The Turner Diaries

Eat, Pray, Love

Managing Herpes: Living And Loving With HSV

Atlas Shrugged

Richard M. Nixon: A Life In Full

Voices By Darryl Hall And John Oates

Celine Dion: For Keeps

Mein Kampf

Dianetics

Bitch: In Praise Of Difficult Women

The King James Bible
Squirt

WTF?

You humans are crazy!

Thank god my daddy is a good daddy! But now I wish he was a vegetarian!

Also, I'm pretty fast and if he was hungry I think I could outrun him.

Anyway, us in the kitty world are now praying to Morris The Great Cat God to steal this man's soul.

Cops catch dude who was marinating and preparing to cook his cat.

"Police in Buffalo arrested 51-year-old Gary L. Korkuc after they pulled him over for blowing through a stop sign, and found four-year-old Navarro marinating in his trunk in a mixture of oil, crushed red peppers, chili pepper and salt. Spicy! So why would Korkuc want to eat his cat? According to a memo from the staff at the local SPCA, obtained by the Buffalo News, Korkuc said he no longer wanted Navarro because the cat was "possessive, greedy and wasteful." He told police that Navarro was mean to him. The memo added, "Do not under any circumstances adopt to this man ever again."
lohan

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm

So, you remember that judge that made Lohan wear that SCRAM bracelet even though it's so inaccurate it can be set off by English muffins?

Yeah, it's the same one that sentenced her to three months in jail and three months in rehab, even though the head of the place charged with monitoring LiLo said that she had sought and gotten permission for every missed meeting.

That judge just had to recuse herself from the case, because before sentencing she had improper communications with the management of the treatment center she sentenced LiLo to go to even though the medical experts said it would not be the right place for her.

I've said it from the start - this was a rigged fucking game. I wonder if she talked to the SCRAM people as well. I wonder how much SCRAM and Morningside Recovery stood to make from the judge's rulings and sentencing.

And, I really wonder how often people who aren't famous are completely screwed over by the obviously deeply fucked up LA County justice system.