January 20th, 2010

Massachusetts Election Analysis

Liberals are pissed off that Obama did not turn out to be God.

Tea Party People are pissed off that a nigger is in the White House.

Republicans are horrified at the prospect of poor people eventually being healthy enough to vote.

Breaking News

(AP) -- LOS ANGELES - NBC President Jeffery Zucker today announced that Erik Estrada will join a revamped version of The Tonight Show to co-host with the returning Jay Leno.

"Over time the late night demographics have changed considerably," Zucker said. "For years, people like Johnny Carson, Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien represented heartland America. But now we've decided to look towards the future of television as a rainbow coalition of entertainment."

Estrada and Leno will do back to back opening monologues in both English and Spanish before moving on to interview a variety of guests.

"We believe that Erik will be able to connect strongly with the type of talent that appeals to younger urban viewers, while Leno will be able to continue to attract traditional Tonight Show viewers in rural and conservative regions of the country."

Leno said he understood and embraced the move.

"The way things are, right now," Leno said. "we really have two Americas and it's difficult to connect with people from the Red and Blue states at the same time. Working with Erik should give us all a chance at bringing various segments of the population together. Uniting the country has been the goal of The Tonight Show since the days of Jack Parr."

Estrada also said he was looking forward to the challenge.

"¡Muérete Letterman! ¡Muérete!", he commented.

James Ellroy

I'll do a larger post about this tomorrow.

But for tonight I just want to say he was the nicest and most gracious famous person I've ever met.

Beyond that Rome Girl was worried that she'd cry if he was rude to her.

Instead she ended up crying while he was reading from his latest book, after he answered one of her questions and, in general, because he was so fucking nice.

The last thing he said to us was:

"You honor me."