January 5th, 2010

Dear Lindsay Lohan


I think you are cool. I know a lot of people make fun of you and shit, but fuck it, I loved Mean Girls and it can't have been easy to let people know you were in the middle of a lesbian relationship while you were under contract to Disney for christ sakes.

Plus, your family is a nightmare, you've been in the spotlight since you were like 12 and I can't imagine if my relationship breakup arguments when I was 19 were fucking saved by TMZ for posterity.

But, today, I hope you are sitting somewhere and paying real, real close attention to the stories about Casey Johnson's death.

Seriously, LiLo, Casey was a blond haired near billionaire who also had a love of drugs, drama and the fairer sex. As Jezebel points out it must have sucked for Casey to have her relationships posted all over the tabloids with the focus on her sexual orientation. I suspect you have some sympathy for her situation. While there is a sense that being rich and famous and white and privileged gives you a free pass in America, it clearly doesn't.

Casey made it to 30. By the time she died she'd been cut off from most of her family money, was about to have most of her possessions repossessed and her essential financial plan was to marry a MTV reality star in order to pay for her drug habits.

At the end of the day you can argue about what led Casey to this. Too much money too young? The tabloids? Trying to be gay or bi or whatever in a straight society?

But, no matter what aimed the gun, it's the drugs that pulled the trigger. Use her as a lesson. Don't let your family, the paparazzi and the people who make you feel weak win.

When you get rid of the drugs you'll probably find out who you are and you'll probably like that person. And, the people around you will probably like her too.

So, think long and hard today and see if you can dodge the abyss.

I know I want to learn about the woman you can become.