April 12th, 2008

Another Pointless Guns N Roses Post

The dudes who make Guitar Hero are getting shit because they are accused of not representing black artists on their game.

They keep responding that the accusation is false because they have Guns N Roses on every edition and that Slash is "Black."

Now, I get that Slash is not the whitest man in the world. But I've been watching a lot of Guns N Roses videos while Rome Girl has been gone and I have to say that I don't think Slash is exactly what people think of when they think of a "black artist."

Though maybe I'm just missing something.


I Had A Dream That Just Woke Me Up

Hunter S. Thompson and I were in Las Vegas and were hanging out in a hotel lobby when this dude started waving at us.

The guy was the geekiest looking guy in the world with acne and Waldo style glasses, but when Hunter noticed that he was standing in front of a small portable shark tank he said to me "Hold on, Bart, this guy may be more on the ball than you think."

So we went up to the dude and ogled the great white shark who was in the tank. It had a giant paisley baseball in its mouth.

The geek told us he was having problems getting the hotel staff to help him move the shark up to his room.

"She just wants to play catch with someone," the geek said. "And she's tired of playing catch with me."

"Put a sign on the tank saying 'have you seen my mate'" Hunter told the guy, "and I bet you'll have someone along to help you in five seconds flat."

Pas De Pas De Pas De

I usually hate the fliers that bands leave around all the bars here, because they all sorta look the same and just end up being litter.

But I am amused by one I saw tonight.

The band is called "Les Touffes Kretiennes" but what really got my eye was their slogan:

"Fanfare Pas Tres Katholique."

How can I not love that?

Facebook Ettiquette

Dear Facebook Users,

Writing on my funwall or sending me messages, invitations, tagged pictures, etc... is fun and acceptable when done in moderation.

But, when I get "xxx has written on your funwall" five or six times in a 15 minute period from the same person or if the same person then spends the next hour inviting me to ridiculous applications, sending me messages they could easily tell me in person later at night or tagging 17 photos you become no different than a spammer.

It's even worse when you do this every single day - and don't seem to notice that I've completely stopped responding to anything you send me on facebook.

When I'm online I'm generally working. This means that while I'm happy to get a message saying "Hey, how are you?" and will respond, I don't want to have to stop work and check my "funwall" 15 times in an hour and a half.

It's just rude.

Plus, if you can send stuff to my funwall, you can easily send the same information to me here on LJ or to my regular email - both of which take much, much less time for me to check than Facebook, which requires me to load up a slow loading webpage each and every time I check your funwall message, vampire fighting invitation or quiz about some obscure sport that I don't play.



P.S. This does not apply to any women who want to take naked photos of themselves, put them on facebook and then tag them. I'm happy to check facebook every 35 seconds in that situation.

Will Anyone Get It?

I'm doing a sales letter for a device which allows people to have lucid dreams - i.e. you can control what you dream about.

One of the sales points the client wants me to make is that you could "perform with your favorite rock band."

My headline idea is "Rock and Roll All Night - Without Having To Party Every Day!"

Do you think anyone will get it - or is the reference too dated?

Would "Living In The Limelight - The Universal Dream!" be better?


"Off To Never Never Land!"


One of my gay clients is putting together a site for gay bears.

As part of that he wants to have a series of informational articles on bear culture and asked me to brainstorm and ask around about what people coming to a bear site might be interested in.

Obviously we'll explain what a bear is, the history of bear culture, how bears and twinks interact, bear barebacking, etc..

But, I'm just curious - what do you think you'd want to learn about on a gay bear dating site?