February 12th, 2008

Dog Day Afternoon

What surprises me about this story isn't that Patty Hearst won the Westminster Dog Show.

It's that she still looks pretty hot.

She could rob my bank any day.

10 points to anyone younger than me who gets the headline reference.


So, after asking both Rome Girl and I for our address my step mom has now sent me a note saying that she's had amazon send my birthday present to a similar, though not exact, address. She has it as "Longdoc-Montpellier" and has addressed to to Bart (Rome Girl's last name.)

She said she thought that since Rome Girl gets more mail than I do that the postman would be more likely to deliver a package addressed to her last name.

Of course, this is going to be a problem if by some miracle the thing shows up - becasue you have to pick up packages at the post office and my ID certainly doesn't say "Bart (Rome Girl's last name.)"

When my dad was in charge of presents he used to just fedex shit to my local bar and/or stick money in my account. Both of which was a lot simpler.

She also bitched and moaned about how expensive video games are on Amazon.co.uk - when honestly she could have just used Amazon.fr or like just given Rome Girl money to buy me a game and saved herself some money. Like, I don't think it's my fault that the Pound is stronger than the Dollar and/or that the postage is high when she chose to send it from the UK when she didn't have to.

Family Shit

So, I got an invitation in the mail to my youngest cousin's wedding which will be held in Bangor in the summer.

I've only seen Lee Anne once in the past 10 year or so (and she's only 22, so that's a big difference) but she was always my favorite cousin.

So, part of me would like to go.

The problem is that my parents - who are also invited - haven't spoken to Lee Anne's parents in something like 20 years. And when they talk about them they have really shitty - and untrue - things to say.

But, because they like Lee Anne, I'm afraid they'll go. And if they do go, I'm worried that my Step Mom will get drunk and cause a huge fight/scene (because that's what she does when she's around people she doesn't like and alcohol is involved.)

Then, I'll get roped into it on one side or another - because I really like my Uncle John and Aunt Janet - who, despite my parent's feelings about them took care of me most summers from age 8 to 18, while my parents were doing vacations and shit with their summers.

So, I'm worried I'll end up spending a lot of money going back to the states to simply end up having an awful time.

On the other hand, I really do like Lee Anne.

Chained Heat

TALLAHASSEE, Florida (CNN) -- Softball, drunken orgies and a prison system run like the mafia. That's what Florida's former prison secretary says he inherited when he took over one of the nation's largest prison systems two years ago.

n fact, on his first day on the job, James McDonough says he walked into his office -- the same one his predecessor used -- and there was crime scene tape preventing anyone from entering.

"That was an indication we had a problem in the department," McDonough told CNN in an exclusive interview before he stepped down last Thursday.

McDonough revealed a startling list of alleged abuses and crimes going on inside Florida's prisons:

• Top prison officials admitting to kickbacks;

• Guards importing and selling steroids in an effort to give them an edge on the softball field;

• Taxpayer funds to pay for booze and women;

• Guards who punished other guards who threatened to report them.