October 28th, 2007

The Numbers Game

MSNBC has a sex survey for women up now.

The main point of the survey seems to be to find out if women are honest angels or lying bitches in the bedroom.

Most of the responses are what you would expect - the vast majority of the women don't lie to their partners about birth control or STD status.

What is interesting is that almost half of the women responded admitted that they lie to their partners about the number of dudes they've slept with, mostly because they think they've been with too many.

What. The. Fuck.

I mean this isn't 1955. I doubt most guys (and certainly most guys who you'd want to fuck) would give a shit about the number of dudes you've been with. If anything, I'd like it if the girl had as many partners as possible - since it would mean she's comfortable with her sexuality and probably knows how to do some fun shit.

Are their really guys out there who want repressed sexually inexperienced prudes?

Or, are women simply psyching themselves out?

Size

Rap and Reggae are more popular in France than they really should be - particularly among French dudes who don't speak a word of English, but insist on blasting the music in the afternoon and trying to sing/rap along with it.

Some people call people like that "assholes." I call them "neighbors."

Anyway, one of our neighbors often plays this one rap tune where the rapper constantly says "My penis is fucking large."

I think it's one of the only times outside of science class that I've heard a dude call his cock a "penis."

Also, how fucking insecure do you have to be to write a song about your big dick?

And, you have no idea the number of funny ways there are for a French guy to misunderstand/mispronouce that sentence.

I swear, a few minutes ago I heard him sing, "My pants is fucking Lars!"

Coke Is It!

On my doctor's advice I've cut caffeine out of my diet - and is has helped reduce the number of panic attacks (or at least I think it has. I've also been seeing a shrink twice a week and taking Xanax, so it could just be coincidental.)

But, today I broke down and got myself my first Coca Cola in about six weeks.

Man, does it taste good.

I'm savoring every drop like it was the nectar of the gods.

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Fetishes

As she's discussed on her own blog, Rome Girl and I now have a deal:

Everytime I do the dishes she gives me a blow job.

It works out well for both of us because:

1. She hates doing the dishes.

2. Unless motivated I'll let the dishes pile up for days.

3. It takes a lot less time and effort to give me a blow job than it does to do the dishes, so she kinda wins.

The only downside is that I now start to get hard - and sometimes even drip precum while I'm doing the dishes and the smell of dish soap is sorta erotic for me.

I hope this doesn't develop into a fetish. I mean I don't want to end up yearning to do other people's dishes when I'm at their pads or like feel compelled to whack off in the dish soap aisle of the local grocery store.

Which brings me to my question:

Can fetishes be created or am is this just a case of "Dog meet Pavlov. Pavlov meet dog."

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Saw

Because I can't find a decent copy of Saw IV to download I'm going to show Rome Girl the original Saw for the first time tonight.

I'm not sure if she'll love it or hate it.

As the Village Voice says in their review:

"The Saw movies are either clever in a really stupid way, or stupid in a surprisingly clever way."

She Liked The Saw Films

Rome Girl liked the Saw movies.

We just watched all three back to back.

I was worried she was going to hate them. She didn't love them but was more than up to keep watching all three and found them "really interesting."

Here are some of our observations (this is the second time I"ve seen the three of them.)

1. Why didn't they call the movie "Jigsaw?" It would make more sense.

2. They don't need to be as gory as they are. Because they are clever and the gore almost makes you forget they are clever.

3. They aren't really like watching movies. They are more like watching really, really good episodes of CSI or Law & Order SVU.

4. Jigsaw could have been a lot more helpful to everyone (and saved his own life) at the end of Sas 3 simply by telling the guy straightforwardly what was going on rather than being weirdo enigmatic dude.

5. Jigsaw seems like a pretty smart guy - so how did he not figure out that amanda was a nut job?

Antichrist Superstar

The other night Coma White and I were discussing what we are going to wear to the Marilyn Manson show.

I think I'm going wear:

1. Leopard print mini skirt the dirty baker is willing to lend me.

2. Black misfits skull T-shirt.

3. Black leather jacket.

4. Fishnets.

5. Lee press on nails for my pinkies, paint them black and then shape them like coke spoons.

6. Lots of eyeliner