October 16th, 2007

Let's Hear It For The Girls

Reading this story about a dude in Philly who raped more than 100 women and got away with it stared me thinking about the relationship between the sexes and how, more often than not girls get the short end of the stick.

Before we go any further - and to prevent troll comments - yes, I'm going to generalize a bit. Deal with it.

The thing is as guys we often bitch (or hear other dudes bitching) about girls. How they have it easy because they can "get laid anytime they want" or "play games" or "cock tease" or "act like cunts" or any of a number of lame/shitty things that really just mean "Damn, I want to get laid more. It can't possibly be my fault so I'll blame the bitches" or even more sadly "I don't want other guys to think I'm gay/a wuss/a pussy so I'll play along with the bitch bashing going on tonight."

But the thing is other than the whole multiple orgasm issue guys really do have most of the advantages when it comes to sex/dating/whatever and girls (pun very much intended) get screwed.


1. If we want to have kids we have no time limit. We can make babies when we are like 70. So, we can afford to fuck around, do one night stands, put shit off, party with no responsibility into our 40s if we want to and whatever. Women, if they want to have a family have to at some point in their 30s start to get serious and make it the fuck happen. Their bodies don't give them unlimited amounts of time.

2. Unless we live in a really shitty neighborhood, we can pick up a book or magazine and walk to a local bar, sit down and have a drink and be left the fuck alone if we want to be. We don't have to worry that simply sitting at a bar alone means we want to be bothered by people trying to get us drunk/fuck us/rape us/bore us to fucking tears.

3. It's really fucking easy for us to get ready to go out. Got a pair of jeans and clean shirt? We're good to go. No one is going to fucking judge us. With women the way they dress has a lot to do with the way people treat them when they go out. And not just the way guys treat them. Other girls will treat them differently if they wear the wrong shit.

4. Not always, but in general, the older we get the more sexual options we have. If anything, starting to go grey or getting a few wrinkles makes us more attractive to large numbers of the opposite sex. Whether they are correct or not, a lot of women feel like the older they get the less sexual options they have.

5. We can totally get away with having beer bellies, eating shit food and even having man boobs and still get laid and not get shit from our friends. One of Rome Girl's friends just got dumped about four months of marriage because she put on weight. I don't think there is a girl in the world who would dump her boyfriend or husband if he got heavy. If anything, when we put on pounds we become "cuddly."

6. If we go out to a bar we don't have to keep our drinks in our hands at all times or risk waking up two hours later with some dude fucking us while we were drugged. Unless of course we are in certain bars in Chelsea, but they are easy to avoid.

7. We can totally fart whenever and wherever we want.

8. If we get too drunk in a bar the worst thing that will happen to us is that we get into a fight. Many, many, many worse things can happen to a drunk woman alone in a bar.

9. It's despicable but if we do get drunk and have unprotected sex with a stranger and a child develops because of it we can disappear. It's not in our stomachs for nine months and a responsibility for the rest of our lives. In fact, we may never even know if we have offspring out there.

10. With rare exceptions no one ever tries to choke us or hold us down for oral sex.

11. From roughly age 12 onward we have orgasms on a regular basis. Some women are in their 20s or even 30s before they even have their first orgasm.