March 16th, 2007

Dear Microsoft, Adobe, Java And Firefox

Thank you very much for deciding that you would all "automatic update" your programs on the same day.

It was really nice to waste three hours of my time, while each one of your programs downloaded and installed updates. Thank you for not giving me a choice of whether to update or not. More so, thank you for doing so in the middle of a workday.

It was particularly nice how I had to restart my computer after each and every update. Microsoft, you are the best for having 5 updates today - and doing each one individually so I had to restart my computer five times just for you!

Adobe, you are great too, since your updates are aparently millions and millions of megs. I love how when you were installing yourself my computer almost worked - to the point where I could see I had new emails, but not open them.

The best part, Microsoft, Adobe, Java and Firefox, is that after taking three hours to update yourselves, I don't see any difference at all in your performance.

It's just nice to know you care.

Fuck you very much,

Bart

Bella Roma

I'm still worried about Rome Girl's mental health. But, I see a light on the horizon. I think she's going to Rome next weekend to chill with her friends and break whatever cycle is fucking with her serotonin.

That said, she did wake up around 8 a.m. today with a mania to clean the apartment. It looks really, nice now. Afterwards she went back to bed.

I bought her a big giant "KinderEgg For Girls" and that seemed to make her happy.

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WOW

Someone has been waiting for years for this freelance gig to be posted:

Project Description
I need someone to write me a guide for the game World of Warcraft. The purpose of it is to teach gamers how to reach level 70 in under 10 days. The guide will need to be at least 80% Questing and 20% Grinding. Meaning, you would actually need to level a character from 1-70 and do proper research of quests using thottbot.com or wow.allakhazam.com.

Quest Research means finding out how much experience you will receive for doing a quest to see if it will be worth your time. This may be a slow process at first but as you get going this becomes faster and easier.

I will provide you with a free game and will pay your your monthly subscription fee for as long as it takes to complete the project. The due date is not important. Take your time and do a good job and do proper quest research and don't burn yourself out.. take breaks. I will pay between $1,000 and $1,500 plus expenses.


If only I knew something about this game!

Sedu?

What do you think this freelance job posting is all about?

Project Description
I need an article for my website that's a simple but comprehensive how-to guide to sedu hairstyles---the more experience you have actually doing this, the more of an expert you are, the better (any writer-hairstylists out there?? :) !! I WILL pay well for QUALITY.

Any person who knows nothing about sedu other than J. Lo is doing it and she wants to do it, too, ought to be able to read this article, love it, and then get the hairstyle they want by following the instructions in this article.