December 16th, 2005


Woke up around 8 to smoke a cig and take a piss. Went to flush the toilet and nothing happened. Turned on the sink to wash my hands and no water came out. Tested all the other taps and still no water.

Since I still have the same landlord who left me without electricity for three weeks in the middle of winter several years ago, I went into a panic, convinced that he had not paid the water bill. This would be very, very bad, since Rome Girl comes back Sunday and I have not done the dishes in a week. Also because I had read porn last night and smelled of jizz and sweat. Imagine what I would smell like in three days?

So I called everyone I could think of, looked up phone numbers for the water company online, tried to figure out exactly how to say "Why is my water turned off." Looked to the cat for advice and was in a state of paranoia.

Then the water came back on.