bart_calendar (bart_calendar) wrote,

The Hierarchy Of Freelance Clients

1. Escorts. They know the value of money. And they know the importance of getting paid. And, even if you charge them $600 for an ad that takes you less than a day to write, it's worth it to  them if it gets them even two clients. So, they pay well, they pay right away and they treat you with respect. And they refer you to their friends.

2. Adult Websites. Pay slightly less well than escorts but still extremely well. They have trouble getting writers and will treat you with an insane amount of respect. Know that people think they are sleazy, so they pay either in advance or the minute you are done. Will let you use any type of weird slang you can come up with.

3. Experienced Web Entrepreneurs. They've already tried to hire cheap offshore writers and gotten burned. They know that it's worth it to pay more for an experienced writer, because it can be the difference between their product doing $20,000 at launch and $500 at launch. Will come back with new products every couple of months.

4.  New Web Entrepreneurs. Pay less well then the experienced ones  per product but want to try out tons of products so will keep  coming back to you every few days and the payments add up. Will eventually try out someone cheap in the Far East and get  burned. You have to wait through this. Then, they will come back to you and offer you more money than you would have charged them in the first place because they don't want to get burned again.

5. True Believers. People who think they have created the best product in the world. They will either pay you really well or try to talk you into some bullshit profit sharing thing. The money they pay you will be good but they are fanatics and will require 5,478 revisions.

6. Corporations. Will look good when you pitch to better clients. But, will have a committee go through every draft and come up with bullshit changes and often change the entire direction of the ad campaign mid stream. Once you are done you have to submit your bill to their accounting office and it can take up to three months for them to pay you. Only good to work for so you can put them on your resume.

7. Newspapers/Magazines. Will try to get you to work for free. What they will pay you is so close to free it might  as well be. Will act like arrogant pieces of shit who think they are doing you a favor. You might get paid in six months. You might not get paid at all. They will make you dream about them dying in a fire.
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