bart_calendar (bart_calendar) wrote,

Pope Resigns

(CNN)-- Pope Benedict XVI announced today that he will resign effective Feb. 28 citing conflicts between the word of Jesus and the actions of the Vatican.

"It would be immoral and unchristian of me to continue to serve as the leader of a church that no longer follows the strictures of the Son of God," the pope said in a prepared statement. "I do no know how the Catholic Church has strayed so far from our mission, but I do know that it would be a sin to continue to serve as their representative."

Benedict said that issues involving contraceptive usage, homophobia and cover ups of sex scandals involving the clergy left him "deeply troubled" about the state of The Church in 2013.

"Jesus said that we should love all men as though they were our brothers," Benedict said. "I can't imagine that he would sanction us encouraging people in Africa to die slow painful deaths that could easily be prevented with low cost prophylactic devices."

The Church's treatment of gays and the ongoing Vatican Bank scandal also played into his decision to abdicate his post, Benedict said.

"Honestly, Jesus never said anything about homosexuality at all," he said. "But, he did say that we should keep the money changers out of the temples. So, why we are condemning men and women for loving who they want to love, and at the same time manipulating currency rates to aid money laundering is baffling to me."

The Pope said that he was also confused by the Church's unwillingness to let priests marry.

"Honestly, we put that into place a long time ago as a dodge around inheritance laws before contract litigation existed," Benedict said. "But, these days there would be many ways to accomplish the same goals without forcing people to repress their sexualities to the point where they feel compelled to take advantage of the most vulnerable parts of our congregation."

When asked how he felt about his tenure, Benedict said "I used to think joining Hitler Youth was the biggest mistake of my life. But, now, looking back, agreeing to lead a church that no longer cares about what Jesus was trying to tell us, seems like an even bigger error of judgement."
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