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Oct. 6th, 2015

Religious Freedom - And How You Know The GOP Is Full Of Shit About It

So, a county clerk doesn't want to issue marriage licenses to gay people on the basis of religious freedom.

The Republicans rally around her and say that she should be celebrated for standing up for her religious principles.

Now a Florida candidate for Senate has admitted killing a goat and drinking its blood as a sacrifice to his pagan gods.

And he's getting a world of shit for it.

If the GOP really gave a shit about brave stands for religious convictions they would be standing up for this guy - because it's a hell of a lot braver to do what he did in honor of your religion than to simply refuse to sign a piece of paper at your place of work.

Come on Huckabee, Bush, and Trump. Do a photo op with this guy and prove to the world that you really believe in religious freedom and aren't just pandering to a bunch of homophobes for votes.

Oct. 5th, 2015

Who Did Donna Martin Fuck?

In a recent interview Tori Spelling admits she slept with two of the male leads on Beverly Hills 90210.

She said one was Brian Austin Green, but wouldn't say who the other one was.

What's your guess?

Who Did Tori Do?

The Dad

Yes, Girls Fuck Assholes

The key word in that headline is "girls."  I got to thinking about this after the latest mass shooter and the general bitching that these dudes often feel that girls won't fuck them because they only fuck "assholes."

Here's the thing. Yes, teenage girls fuck assholes. That's because they have no life experience and live in a youth vacuum where social status is everything. They don't fuck the guys they really want to fuck, they fuck the guys that they think their peer group thinks they should fuck.  And, those dudes tend to be assholes.

But here's another thing, teenage boys fuck assholes as well. And they do so for the exact same reasons. They aren't fucking for fucking, they are fucking for peer status.

Most importantly both boys and girls fuck assholes because, in general, teenagers are assholes.

Women are anothe story. Girls grow up into women and eventually get super tired of fucking assholes just to impress their friends and then start dating cool people. Then the assholes suddenly stop getting laid and decent guys start getting their dicks wet.

The same thing happens to men (though it often takes a few more years.) Eventually they too get tired of fucking douchecanoes and start making reasonable sexual choices.

This is the thing I wish boys would understand. Sure you might not be getting any trim right now, but as long as you don't let yourself turn into a super asshole, girls will become women and want to fuck decent men. Just have a little patience.

Trust me, it's worth it.

Sep. 29th, 2015

So I. Thought I. Might Like To Go To The Show


Do You Give Your Dudes A Helping Hand?

On my friends list a woman posted that she and a lot of her friends get frustrated because they want to learn how to get good at giving hand jobs, but never have the chance because most of the dudes they have been with are very anti-hand job.

I'd never heard of this before - and I love hand jobs - so I thought this is kind of strange. But then again, maybe I'm the weirdo.

So, that' calls for a poll.

Poll #2023596 Handys

Dudes: Do You Like Hand Jobs?

I'm not a dude.

Women: Have Dudes You've Been With Liked Hand Jobs?

I'm a dude or a woman who is not into dick.

Sep. 28th, 2015

What Song Makes You Happiest?

According to science the song that will make people feel the most good is by Queen.

But that said, taste is personal. And I suspect the way our lives play out determines what particular songs make us the most happy.

What is the song that can lift you - if only for three minutes - out of the darkest depression?

Here's mine.

Tell me yours.

Sep. 27th, 2015

Two Spaces After A Period Is Important


Sep. 26th, 2015

Not The Waste Lands

T.S. Elliot was right when he said "The naming of cats is a difficult matter."

My kitten has several names.

Harley = You are sleeping but I want to cuddle with you so I'm going to wake your kitten ass up but you can fall asleep in my arms.

HQ = Come play with me.

Little One = You are doing something really cute.

Quinn = Holy shit what you are doing is dumb, WTF?

Miss Qiunn = You are fallen asleep in my arms and I just want to say your name.

Harley Quinn = What you are doing is pissing me off.

Harleen = Stop this shit right the fuck now.

Hareleen Quinzell = I'm about to sell you to the used cat store.

Sep. 25th, 2015

Borderlands - Why Did Nobody Tell Me This Existed?

A loyal blog reader bought me a copy of Borderlands:The Handsome Collection yesterday and holy mother of god am I enjoying this.

1. It's like first person Final Fantasy.

2. What do I like to do in games? Get experience points and open chests. This has a ton of that!

3. What do I hate in games? When the first level is fucking impossible. I breezed through the first two challenges. This will make me want to do the harder ones because I feel good about the game. When a game - Final Fantasy Type O or GTA V for example - make the first level/boss super hard it makes me feel bad so I just give up. This game makes me feel good.

4. Holy shit the robot reminds me of my kitten.

5. The game is funny.

6. The game looks great.

7. The game also doesn't seem to give a fuck if I worry about missions or not. It seems completely happy to reward me just for randomly wandering around killing things.

Sep. 24th, 2015

Pope Francis Talking To Congress

What the hell do you do when you are a Republican member of Congress elected into office by people who love Jesus and then the biggest Jesus lover on earth tells you in public that everything you are for is something Jesus would be against?

Seriously, dude told them that:

1. Jesus would address climate change.

2. Jesus would let immigrants in.

3. Jesus would give more money to poor and working people.

And he found sections in the Bible to back up  his shit.

I guess they simply have to pray that "Protestants hate Catholics" saves them. But, Jesus, that's a hell of a risk.

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October 2015




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